


Hanging By A Moment

by LyricallyInclined23



Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-22
Updated: 2017-04-22
Packaged: 2018-10-22 14:35:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10699023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LyricallyInclined23/pseuds/LyricallyInclined23
Summary: Lyrically inspired PreathSong: Hanging by a moment





	Hanging By A Moment

**Author's Note:**

> One shot based on Lifehouse's Hanging By A Moment. Beautiful song. This had to be written ever since I heard Tobin singing to this for like 3 seconds. Maybe a bit too angsty but I needed to get this out of my system. Enjoy!

  Tobin's always firmly believed that travelling, experiencing and living in the moment was the way to go. Her chill and friendly personality is perhaps a product of her 'baller' lifestyle shown by her freedom with the ball and on the field. The self-acclaimed nomad was never known to go steady, her off-season spent on almost aimless pursuits across the country and beyond, surprising and worrying friends who could never seem to guess where she was, also shocking them when she turns up at their door unannounced. She lives in the moment, crazy and unplanned as they come about.

  On the national stage, the outstanding performance she showcased with the national team in 2016 earns her her first Player of the Year Award. Her league play, despite the heart wrenching finish only supported her case for the title. She's entering her golden years and even though she's never failed to impress with her flair out on the field before, now coupled with her play making ability and the real estates of defensive ground she covers, she was becoming a force to be reckoned with. The flanks were quite frankly her stomping grounds and the fans go ballistic when she lays her claim on her territory, usually concluding with a pin point cross and the opposition nursing broken ankles and bruised egos alike.

  
  In short Tobin's life was perfect. She's playing the best soccer of her career. She should be chill and content.

  
  Then why the heck does she feel this constant pang in her chest.

  
  They were in January camp with the national team, heading back to the lodges after another gruelling practice. _The workouts Dawn cooks up,_ Tobin thought dryly. _I ain't getting old, but I certainly ain't getting younger._

  
  She had offered to drive much to the endless banter from her teammates mostly generated around the phrase 'soccer mom', or 'soccer dad' as Ashlyn laughed out, Ali slapping her over the head, unable to contain her laughter as well.

  
  Tobin laughed heartily though, easily copping the onslaught, even better when her girlfriend Christen Press leant around the headrest to give her a quick comforting kiss as she climbed into the car, ignoring the camera fixed at the front to capture footage of the Harry friendship for the new YouTube video.

  
  Her girlfriend. Christen Press. Tobin would never get tired of being able to link those two phrases in her head.

    
  Allie tried to hide the fact that Christen had gotten into the same car as Tobin, halfhearted as it was, done for the sake of the fans and maintaining professionalism. The weird waving from her friend earns a sheepish grin from Tobin.  
Unconsciously running her hand through her hair she tried to play off her discomfort both from the unknown, unfamiliar pang in her heart and the fact she was on camera by singing along to Lifehouse's Hanging By a Moment as it blared through the radio.

   
  In complete honesty she was somewhat blindsided, like whiplash when she runs into an opponent. She was drowning, desperate to stay afloat and grasping at straws slipping through her fingers. Her chill demeanour didn't waver but her mind and heart were in turmoil. Tobin was trying to latch onto something quickly drifting away which just multiplied the confusion as she was always thought she was willing to let go, or move onto 'new adventures' as her mom would say.

  
  Not this time though. She would also be lying if she hadn't felt like this before either. As Christen and her spent their off-season together in LA and Portland there were several moments when she felt like she did now. Before that as well. But Tobin never had time to figure out the aching, longing pain that permeated her consciousness. The World Cup high and the Olympics left very little space to occupy in her mind and now during off-season she just went back to goofily smiling at her girlfriend or kissing her senseless in the privacy of their apartments.  
 

  These thoughts were like defenders sprinting back down the field in her mind as she started up the car, checking her 'soccer kids' were all buckled up. A chorus of yes' and lets go's resounded out, but not without an 'I'm starving, hurry up' from Alex Morgan.

  
  Christen grinned as she caught Tobin staring at her in the front mirror as she continued to sing along to Lifehouse, the chorus beginning once again. Throwing a quick glance at Allie who was semi-engrossed with her phone, she brought her eyes back to the emerald irises that flared to life in the passing street lights.

  Without warning however, the lyrics, unexpectedly, literally knocked the air out of her lungs. Suddenly her life snapped into focus and everything made sense in a single chorus of a song she was singing to her girlfriend while staring into her beautiful green eyes through the mirror of the team car.

  
_I'm falling even more in love with you_  
_Letting go of all I've held onto_  
_I'm standing here until you make me move_  
_Hanging by a moment here with you_

  
  The lyrics were perfect in describing the lingering feeling plaguing her thoughts.

  
  The feeling she got whenever Christen so much as looked at her.

  
  Tobin shook her head in utter disbelief at how absolutely whipped she was. Everything that Christen did had her falling over, sending the Nutmeg Queen herself into a stumbling daze and she couldn't help it. But what made her realise the extent of her love was the fact she couldn't ever truly let go now. She hadn't been for the past year, the best year of her life.

  Every memory of Christen; countless dates, candlelit dinners, endless midnight phone calls, kisses, photos, long drives and plane flights, sharing hotel rooms and even the flirting moments they tried to subtlety play in front of the cameras and on the field were engrained in her mind.

  She wanted to relive every moment.

  She didn't want to have to move on.

  She never wanted to let go ever again.

  She wanted to be able to freeze time with Christen at her side, hanging onto every moment she would let her have, hoping against all odds she wouldn't forget any memory they could share together.

  For Tobin, for her perspective on life to date, it was fucking terrifying and exhilarating.

  
  Her outlook on life was spun around on its axis and as cliche as it was, Tobin was utterly head over cleats in love.

  Laughing at her almost shocking revelation she grinned even harder as she thought about the time she played against Christen in Portland. The significance of the moment at the time was lost on her. But it was different now.  
Christen had stepped up to take a free kick outside the box and Tobin had stood next to Klingenberg in the two person wall.

  Tobin knew she had the most dorky expression screwed her face.

  At the time she thought that she was just in awe of how stunning a sweaty Christen Press was but actually she had just wanted to stand there for the rest of her existence, happy that she got to share the game she loved with the girl she was in love with.

  Chastising herself, while continuing to sing she also noted the fact she was completely distracted from soccer, potentially the now second love of her life, whilst on a soccer field, during a nationally televised game.

  Needless to say Tobin couldn't believe it. There's was no other way she could phrase her current mindset even as the last electric note was fading into the background and Christen turned to strike up a conversation with Alex in the backseat.

  Still the epitome of chill though, Tobin continued to sing with Allie, whistling and belting out lyrics. As if she didn't have a life changing thought process over the course of five minutes, on camera as well. Hopefully the editing guys didn't use too much of the footage. Her enthusiasm even caught the attention of Christen.  
Her look basically translated into _really Tobin_? as Allie and her emptied out all the oxygen in their lungs, boisterously singing to Rihanna. Tobin grinned dopily at her, Christen shaking her head and biting her lip to hide her smile.

  
  Another moment to hang onto.

~

  Tobin wasn't even going to lie. She was extremely clingy that night during dinner.

  Normally refraining from PDA even in front of their teammates, she couldn't help herself. She leant fully into Christen trying to create as much body contact as possible and her hands left lingering touches whenever the opportunity presented itself.

  To Tobin that was basically throughout the whole team dinner.

  A lefty herself, she even ate with her right hand as her left arm was wrapped firmly around Christen's waist never leaving her side.

  If Christen noticed the extra clinginess she didn't mention anything, just merely pressing a quick kiss to her temple and smiling lightly at her before turning back to her food.  
But her teammates, being the little endearing shits there were, they definitely noticed.

  Cracks of whips and sexual innuendos echoed throughout the tables. Even Mallory joined in and if Tobin had actually cared she would've been offended that the youngest one on the team, basically her child, was insulting her.

  Not bothering to reply, despite knowing she just invited more banter, Tobin buried her face in the crook of Christen's shoulder, sighing contentedly. She could feel her girlfriend wrap her arms around her and pull her into her seat, kissing her hair probably still sweaty from practise.

  Tobin knew that Christen knew that something was up. The team was full of type A personalities. Even the somewhat reserved people like Becky Sauerbrunn. No one would ever let anybody else insult them without at least taking an equal jab back.

  Ignoring her team and their antics Christen turned to Tobin.

  "What's wrong babe?" She murmured into her ear.

  Tobin tightened her hold and looked up Christen who returned the loving gaze.

  "Don't worry yourself beautiful, everything's perfect, like you," Tobin said with affection.

  "Corny Heath," she jested back.

  "But you love it." Tobin gazed up honey eyes wide and in awe.  
Tobin felt her lean her forehead against hers.

  "Yeah I do, I love you" Christen said and Tobin melted. Again.

  "I love you too."

  Encased in their own warm cloud, they didn't heed their teammates catcalls and jokes just merely holding each other as time appeared to stand still.

~

  Tired from a week of two-a-days, deciphering their coaches illogical plays and muscle snapping workouts, Tobin and Christen traded the chaos of a game occurring in Kelley's room, much to the dismay of Becky, for a long hot shower together and then simply lying side by side in their room. 

  As per team rules, they weren't often rooming together but given the opportunity they tried to make the most of it. The privacy and intimacy was welcomed and much preferred over the craziness they just knew was getting out of hand down the hall.

  This time Christen had her head resting on Tobin's chest, arms wound around her waist and legs tangled together under the sheets. Tobin's got her arm wrapped around her girl, her other hand tracing circles and mindlessly trailing up and down Christen's arms.

  Tobin can definitely say she's never been good with expressing herself clearly. Heck even arguably her best form of expression, with a ball, often at times failed her when she was younger causing misunderstandings with her team and her coaches, them mistaking her for not being serious about the game.

  But for the first time in her life, she really wanted to try. For Christen. She wanted to, no needed to let her know what she was feeling, what Christen had done to her. Despite knowing the pang in her chest and feeling the stark contrasting pain and utter love that she's immersed in to make her feel like holding to every little moment, Tobin wouldn't change it for the world.

  She knew Christen would understand. No one knew her better than she did. This was her way of acknowledging that this relationship was more than anything she ever held close to her. Her way of saying a little more than 'I love you' which she felt was not enough despite the heavy weight behind those three words that have grown so familiar.  
Tobin shifted her head downwards, taking a deep breath under Christen's body. She began to sing the same chorus she sung to her earlier.

  
_I'm falling even more in love with you_  
_Letting go of all I've held onto_  
_I'm standing here until you make me move_  
_Hanging by a moment here with you_  
_I'm living for the only thing I know_  
_Running and not quite sure where to go_  
_And I don't know what I'm diving into_  
_Just hanging by a moment here with you_

  
  This time however, her normally slow drawl when speaking or singing was laced with a quality that even Tobin couldn't identify. She wasn't choking while she sang nor was her voice breaking with emotion. There was unusual seriousness behind the words and a surety that she knew Christen had picked up on in the way her arms gripped her tighter and the realisation dawned on her of what Tobin was trying to say.

  Immediately after she finished the last lyric Tobin watched as Christen fully turned, laying on her, looking at her with shining green eyes lit by the bedside lamp.

  Tobin knew she understood. She would have never been able to explain it coherently even given the chance and a scripted passage. She could tell in the way Christen's eyes searched her own and the way she was looking at her. 

  Like she was her whole world.

  Like she put the stars in the sky.

  She could only hope her eyes mirrored the same love despite her singing earlier.

  Tobin noticed that Christen almost seemed speechless. The Stanford grad was miraculously at a lost for words as her eyes never left hers, still searching and trying to confirm everything Tobin had just implied.

  But just as she had known Christen would understand, she also knew her love was reciprocated.

  Christen didn't glance at her lips.  
She brought her hand up to caress Tobin's face, the sensation already overwhelming her with love.

  For the second time that day Tobin was shook. Christen brought her into an absolutely searing kiss that rocked her world.

  Instinctively, she closed her own eyes, grasping at her hips to pull her impossibly closer. She could feel Christen conveying everything she couldn't voice into one kiss.

  As the kiss deepened they clung almost desperately to one another, hanging by this very moment.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> First time post please leave comments and kudos! Would like some criticism on the angsty waffling that this ended up being.  
> Might be a one off this whole writing thing... we'll see ;)


End file.
